Ay, There’s the Rub
Got a horse? Live in Florida? Does the horse have a very painful crick in its neck? Don’t give it a massage, or you’ll end up in jail where another man who’s as big as a horse in more ways than one will force you to give him a massage.
FLORIDA (St. Petersburg Times) — Robyn Pelszynski trained with experts to provide the ultimate in relaxing messages to Fancy, her 15-year-old gray Arabian horse. Looking for some part-time work, she then inquired about getting a license as a horse massage therapist in Pasco County.
Pelszynski says she was turned away. Florida law gets murky when it comes to holistic therapies for animals, such as aromatherapy and acupressure. Is it legal to massage a horse without a veterinary degree? Advocates for alternative care and veterinarians can’t agree.
But Pelszynski could risk a felony citation for massaging another person’s animal.
“That’s insane,” said Pelszynski, an equestrian living in Spring Hill. “You don’t have the right to administer the same types of things to your horses as you do another human.”
Giving a massage to a horse is a FELONY a.k.a. an offense punishable by a long sentence in a state jail? That’s it, Florida. The rest of America has had enough. The Pee-Wee Herman adult movie house was OK. We let the 2000 Presidential Election slide. We even forgave you for the sheer audacity of your Governor turning the Terry Schiavo tragedy into a national political debate. But this is the last straw. Say goodbye to America and hello to Cuba.
The law, according to legislators, is designed to protect holistic healers or “horse whisperers” from becoming full-fledged veterinarians and diagnosing horses based on holistic practices. Phew, thank God. I was worried legislators were worried about people touching horses in another kind of way.
But the holisitic healers are saying the current felony law prevents them from earning a living. Thankfully, Gov. Jeb Bush has vowed to step in to do what he can to fix the law by blaming the whole thing on Michael Schiavo.