Big Government. Small Brains. Dumb Laws.

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Dumb Laws in the News

Dumb Laws aren't a just thing of the past. We're tracking down breaking news in the world of crazy laws. Keep checking back, because there are new stories every week. The next one could be in your hometown. Let us help keep you on the right side of the law!

Poker? I Hardly Know ‘er!

Posted by Danny an April 28, 2009

Lots of states have anti-poker laws on the books because the government wants to protect you from unnecessarily losing your money to fruitless efforts in this day and age of economic uncertainty (cough GM! cough).

But a new dissection study on the elements of the game could reclassify it entirely and make all of those anti-poker gambling laws obsolete, according to New Scientist magazine.

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A Real Threat to Marriage

Posted by Danny an April 20, 2009

A lot of naysayers claim that legalizing gay marriage would not only damage the sanctity of marriage, but destroy the bond of people who are currently married. That’s not true. Marriage breaks the bond between two people who are married.

Florida, however, has taken this concept a step further making it a crime for unmarried couples to intermingle or even live together.

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Stripper Justice Prevails

Posted by Danny an April 13, 2009

When it’s a good day to be a stripper, it’s also a good day to be an American. Sour economy be damned!

A federal judge struck down a law that tried to outlaw liquor sales at strip clubs, according to the Washington Post.

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That Better Be REAL Cocaine

Posted by Danny an April 6, 2009

Every state has drug laws on the books. But only Arizona has the balls to take it a step farther. We mean literal balls. Arizona has been teabagging Mexico for years.

The state law prohibits the manufacturing of fake drugs.

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The Future is Illegal

Posted by Danny an April 1, 2009

Imagine if the Terminator had once again come to us from the future to warn us of the impending doom that awaits all of mankind.

If he landed in Yamhill, Oregon, he would have immediately been locked up and robots would enslave the Earth into extinction.

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Keep God and His Sword Out of Tennessee

Posted by Danny an March 25, 2009

A lot of politicians like to invoke their spirituality and personal religious beliefs in the debate because let’s face it, trying to wrap their head around physical concepts makes their brain hurt.

One state, however, actually forbids religious people and extremely non-religious people from bringing God into the Capitol.

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Bowled Over in California

Posted by Danny an March 19, 2009

You would think that a free wheeling fun loving state like California would allow this kind of behavior. It seems no state is immune from destroying fun.

Chico, California used to have a law on the books that outlawed public bowling.

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An Affair to Remember

Posted by Danny an March 10, 2009

Ahh, spring is the air. Sniff, sniff, wait that’s not spring.

It’s adultery! Well, you’d better not be in Michigan because it’s illegal, according to the Michigan Penal Code.

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Clotheslines Could Get Clotheslined

Posted by Danny an February 23, 2009

It’s comforting to know that in times of economic strife and moral uncertainty that state and federal legislatures can still take the time to discuss really dumb bills and give people like me a reason to go to work every day.

One lawmaker in Vermont wants to create a “right to dry” outdoors law for his constituents, according to The Times Argus.

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Why New Jersey Sucks

Posted by Danny an January 5, 2009

If you have been in New Jersey recently, first of all, we feel your pain.

Second of all, you may have noticed that people there love to yell out of their cars at people as they pass them on the highway. That’s not alcohol road rage or just plain old assholishness, it’s the law.

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